Negative language

I can’t do that. I’m never going to get the time. Why am I even quoting for this when I’m not going to win it? Something always goes wrong. I always get stuck in traffic. I wish I had time to go to the gym more often. I’m not fit enough to do anything like that. I’ve tried to stop smoking a bunch of times and I can’t do it. I never get enough sleep. My wireless network never connects properly.

Why can’t we talk more positively?

The statements above are all actual or paraphrased ststements that I’ve heard people give over the last couple of weeks. Can anyone spot what they all have in common?

Would you be surprised if I told you that the reality you experience is very likely to be quite different from the reality your colleagues experience? or your husband/wife? or mine?

The problem with reality is its not fundamentally based on whats ‘there’ its based on how we perceive whats there, and that can vary drastically depending on how we interpret and describe that ‘reality’. Have you ever noticed how two different people can watch the same events and have completely different visions of what actually happened?

One of the ways we interpret our world is through the language we use. Not just to describe to other people, but the language we use to urselves. Our internal monologues are an aspect of life that is almost always there, reinforcing our beliefs and understandings, helping us to make sense of what we’ve seen and experienced.  You probably know this already, or at least this likely makes sense to you. The old ‘glass half full’ or ‘half empty’ adage springs to mind as a good example. There is no difference to the actual physical reality, but people will describe and therefore experience the same thing in different ways, and feel and act very differently according to that perspective.

Here’s the rub though – if we already know that how we perceive and describe things to ourselves and others has an impact on our understanding and feelings about those events, why do we persist on using negative language to describe our reality??

‘I can’t do this’???  –  Surely it would be better as ‘How can I do this?’

‘I’m no good at that’ – Better as ‘I’m going to get better at this.’

Is your target unreachable? or do you just need to plan, and action, the steps needed to overachieve?

What are you going to change to make your life better?


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About me.

A professional speaker focused on helping people get more out of their day; for themselves and their companies.
I help people get things done by helping them realise that all the knowledge in the world will do absolutely NOTHING for them - if they don’t use it.
I want to change the world, and getting the right people in the right place is only the start. In todays world it is so, so easy to get pulled into doing all the wrong things. I help people figure out what the right and wrong things are and make sure their energies are focused in the right place.
Feel free to comment, or you can contact me by emailing markbell AT mbsprogress DOT com



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